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clockworkmcnice

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WOW [Tuesday
10:19pm November 13th]
[ mood | depressed ]

Wow its been like 68 weeks since I have last been on lj.  Anyways Ashleigh and I are still together.  It feels like here lately we have been drifiting apart from each other for a couple of months now and I have no idea why.  Maybe its me, I dont know.  She will not talk to me about it and I am afraid to bring it up to her as it might piss her off.  We havent had sex in like forever and the other night we tried but I was asleep and I guess took my time.   I am still so much into her and very much in love with her and want to spend the rest of my life with her.  She went out with Adrea for the night and I am stuck her at the house.  I am bored at the moment and need to vent as you can tell.  It feels like I don't please her anymore but she says I still do.  I wish Her, Zoe and I gcould just run off to San Fran and forget all of our problems.  I know I have a temper that is quick but I have been working on it more and more.  I just don't know what to do now.  I guess I am going to get her some flowers tonight and a card and see if that can help any.  anyways vent over.

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[Wednesday
5:51pm August 3rd]
[ mood | chipper ]

Its me, the no update guy. Lifes been good here lately except for my car. One of Ashleigh's sister's friends back into my hood the other night and want own up to it. I can fix the damage its no problem its the principal that even that it was an accident and she probably had a screaming child in the passport the fact that she denies it and makes every excuse in the book that she did not do it. It sounds like Ashleigh's family knows it was her so that good I guess.... Ok enough with my ranting and raving here. I turn 23 on the tenth. Scary I was I 21 again. I was wishing that Ashleigh and I could out of town during the weekend but she has too work. Now I know how she felt all those times she missed me and I was at work puliing 12 hour shifts seven days a week...uck. Well I need to get ready to go pick up Ashleigh at eight from work. OBTW pics of my car soon to come....the horrrrorrrr.

OBTw also had a great time with Ashleigh and her Neice last night. Love you Chi.

1 comment !!! comment

[Sunday
3:00am July 3rd]
List 5 things you do when alone that relax you completely. Then tag 5 people and have them post their five things in their journal. Also answer Lauren's list and my list and make a list of your own and answer it. When tagged, do this in your own journal, not in the comments!

1. sleep
2. think about Ashleigh
3. Wish Ashleigh was here
4. internet
5. Snuggle with Abbie(dog)

Lauren's List
5 things I have names stuff animals recently
1. n/a
2. n/a
3. n/a
4. n/a
5. n/a


My list
Name 5 things that you are scared of.
1. Being in a busy are w/ tons of people by myself
2. being alone
3. trying new things to make me feel better
4. growing up
5. the week before pay day
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[Tuesday
9:09am May 10th]
[ mood | bouncy ]

6 underground

Take me down, 6 underground,
The ground beneath your feet,
Laid out low, nothing to go
Nowhere a way to meet
I've got a head full of drought,
Down here, so faroff losing out
Round here,

Overground, watch this space,
I'm open to falling from grace

Calm me down, bring it round
Too way high off your street
I can see like nothing else
In me you're better than I wannabe
Don't think 'cos I understand,
I care, don't think 'cos I'm talking we're friends,

Overground, watch this space,
I'm open to falling from grace

Talk me down, safe and sound
Too strung up to sleep
Wear me out, scream and shout
Swear my time's never cheap
I fake my life like I've lived
Too much, I take whatever you're given
Not enough,

Overground, watch this space,
I'm open to falling from grace



Now don't any one think that I wrote this. I found a very old song that I loved in high school. Thanks to the new TV series "Over There" I found this song again. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/clipserve/B000000WCT001003/0/002-6287193-1891249

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[Wednesday
3:09pm April 13th]
[ mood | dirty ]

My new name is dinky apple honkie....oh joy.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/littlecreep/82781.html

Hideki buys Chi a name tag from work so she will never forget. Chiii???

1 comment !!! comment

[Friday
12:48pm April 1st]
[ mood | awake ]

Ugh it is so rainy and damp up here right now. I can't wait till next week where there is no rain hopefully. I go in at 0515 Ashleigh so if you can call me or what not. I probably wont have a chance to come by but if I do it wont be long. Sorry though. Well I am going to get off of here and do my laundry so TTYL.

Hideki loves Chi and buys her a picture book.

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[Thursday
3:30pm March 31st]
[ mood | content ]

Today has been a sleep day for me. I only get to work 430 to 830 tonight which sucks right now cause i need the money bad. Anyways Chi I will be on about 9 tonight and my cell is still setup to take AIM so hit me up before than if you can. Misses my Chi and hopes for the weekend.

Hideki

1 comment !!! comment

[Wednesday
1:45pm March 30th]
[ mood | crazy ]

Last night was so blah. ERRRKK. I haven't seen Ashleigh since saturday night and I miss her so much. She is so much of my life right now and to be dinied her presence is just killing me here. I couldn't sleep last night. It feels strange to only talk to her for five minutes. Here latley I have learning more from her LJ post cause she doesn't have time away from her mom to talk to me. This just sucks. Terri please let Asheleigh and I be one. You can get over the proudness and you'r right thing. Spring Break is coming up for her next week. I just hope to be able to see her. This is making her so unhappy and me too. You told me Terri to never hurt you daughter and I haven't but you so are doing a number. Anyways I just dont feel good right now. I miss my Chi. I really do.

Ashleigh when you read this don't think that I have given up on you. I haven't I am just so blah right now. I love you Ashleigh with all my heart and soul and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I had so much fun with you saturday night. Espcially when we went to Bed, Beth And Beyond. That was fun. Ok I am probaly sounding like a stalker now. I am just in a talkative mood. Ok I am going to get off and get me some food. Hidecki loves Chi and holds on to her heart forever.


Hidecki

2 comment !!! comment

[Tuesday
2:05am March 29th]
[ mood | sad ]





Rough, But Slightly Romantic


You like it when things get a little rough, but you also love to get
romantic and soft with your partner.



Do You Like it Rough and Dirty? Or Soft and Romantic?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva







Your Celebrity Threesome: Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin


You love being with shy and quiet people who like to dodge the spotlight and just cuddle at home.

It's not all about sex to you.

It's more about love, emotion, and family.

When the three of you meet up, the bedroom is definitely not the first stop.

You like to chat about current events, listen to soft music, and drink tea in your London flat.



Which Sexy Celebrity Couple Would You Have a Threesome With?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
3 comment !!! comment

[Tuesday
1:57am March 29th]
Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results
Warmth ||||||||||||||| 46%
Intellect ||||||||||||||||||||| 62%
Emotional Stability |||||||||||| 34%
Aggressiveness ||||||||||||||||||||| 66%
Liveliness |||||||||||||||||| 54%
Dutifulness |||||||||||| 38%
Social Assertiveness |||||||||||| 38%
Sensitivity |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Paranoia |||||||||||||||||||||||| 78%
Abstractness |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Introversion |||||||||||||||||||||||| 78%
Anxiety |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 86%
Openmindedness |||||||||||||||||||||||| 74%
Independence ||||||||||||||| 42%
Perfectionism |||||||||||||||||| 58%
Tension |||||||||||||||||| 54%
Take Cattell 16 Factor Test (similar to 16pf)
personality tests by similarminds.com
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[Monday
2:48am March 28th]
[ mood | chipper ]

Dance, when you're broken up.
Dance, if you've torn the bandage off.
Dance in the middle of the fighting.
Dance in your blood.
Dance, when you're perfectly free.
-- rumi --



OK I have posting way too much I think I need to go to bed. Oh BTW don't worry bout the Extacy thing Chi I was bored and was looking at some of my old sites; sorry if I scared you. But I don't ever wan't to roll again. Hidecki loves Chi 4-ever.

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[Monday
2:20am March 28th]
[ mood | calm ]

Three PointTeletubby RedDurexEwell those were my four favs back in the days.  Not anymore I have now grown out of that experimental stage and now I know what the hell that shit does to your brain.  Any ways much love to my Chi.  You know i'm by your side like Chi sticks to Hidecki. 

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My fav MBM song [Monday
2:14am March 28th]
[ mood | creative ]

This beat that the devil today...
Has nurtured and fostered...
Is inspired by the powers of hell!
And there are young people that are in these rock groups that
are
pulling off their clothes in full view of thousands of young
people.
There asks the question when police dare not step in with the
air thick
with marijuana smoke, a hundred thousand kids! The huge speakers
that
beat off the music as dope-filled entertainers and performers
beat upon
the guitars and drums and the strings. Those young people that
ripped
off their clothes and acted like animals...
They said it's the music
It's the music!

And I really didn't know what I was doing, they said...
I just pulled off my clothes and I had to do it!
They said it's the music
It's the music!

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[Sunday
3:15pm March 27th]
[ mood | blah ]

Ashleigh before I go to work I just wanted to say that I would love to spend the rest of my life with you. I am in love with you. In fact i'm just not curious but I am obsessed with you. You know how to get in contact with me either on here or on my cell. I just wanted to say that I love you and I miss you and I promise everything is going to be ok. I promise you that. BTW I don't ever want to leave you'r side and I am still happy.

1 comment !!! comment

[Sunday
12:30pm March 27th]
[ mood | aggravated ]

Ashleigh when you read this I just wanted you to know that I have not given up on you and you'r mom can never break us up. I won't allow her to do that. Hidecki stands by you'r side always. Chiiii????

1 comment !!! comment

[Sunday
2:28am March 27th]
[ mood | confused ]

OMG Asheligh's mom tripped out again. Oh well I just wanted to say that I love you Ashleigh and I am not giving up on you. If we have been through this much BS and we are still going out there has to be a reson keeping us here. Holds Chi forever.

Hideki

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[Friday
1:01pm March 25th]
[ mood | accomplished ]

Today is just a pretty day. The birds are singing, my neighborhood crack house is in full swing you know the usual good stuff. Anyway I just thought I would post. Ashleigh call me when you get in. I go in at 630 tonight and get off at 0145am I think.

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[Friday
12:40am March 25th]
[ mood | naughty ]

Hey hey hey. I am about to watch Aqua Teen Hunger. Woot woot I am hyper tonight but I am also sick too. I guess I am excited because the weather outside is wonderful and I am in love and I have saturday night off too. Ashleigh call me tommorow when you can so that I may see you. I go in at six. Holds Chi too tight and bust her battery...oopss..Later Chi

1 comment !!! comment

[Thursday
2:15pm March 24th]
[ mood | worried ]

To my Chi.      Chiiiii????

1 comment !!! comment

[Thursday
1:57pm March 24th]
[ mood | blank ]

I am so terrified that Ashleigh is going to go beserk here soon and it feels like there is nothing I can do about it besides tell her that I am there for her. So much has happened in the last 2.5 months since we have been going out its hard for me too. To watch her go through this is tough. I am thinking as soon as my car gets up and running that I want to take a trip out of town for a day and just get away or possibly before then. I think a nice mountin trip is in planning. Anyways I have to go to town to pick up my valve cover to be painted. Hugs my Chi tight and protects her from the world. Call me Ashliegh as soon as you get over there. Call me while I am at work too if you want too. You got the number.

In love with my Chi.

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